January 2001

What to Do While Your Dream Job Materializes

by Rebecca Nerison, Ph.D.
WSBA Lawyers' Assistance Program Psychologist

I've always felt that looking for a job is one of the most difficult tasks on the face of the earth. Active job-seekers expose themselves to scrutiny and rejection with each application or résumé that is sent. Inactive (or underactive) job-seekers are subject to self-criticism and self-recrimination because they're not doing what they "should" be doing. Rejection and/or self-recrimination are not attractive alternatives. So what can you do until you find that perfect union of your skills and a great employer's needs? (Hint: Matching your skills to an employer's needs should be your primary objective.)

Maintaining self-confidence and a sense of one's competence is difficult for job seekers with a clear direction and purpose in mind. It can be next to impossible for those whose career goals are unclear. Therefore, the first tactic I suggest is to ask yourself from the outset, "Is my ladder propped against the right wall?"

What do I mean by this? We've all heard about climbing the ladder of success. The problem is some people climb to the tops of their ladders only to discover that they've arrived somewhere they really don't want to be. This happens to a lot of lawyers. They may have hated law school. Or they played the part of the good soldier and powered through, despite misgivings. Then, they wake up two, seven or 25 years later, to discover they're miserable. Some considered soul-searching at the outset can prevent this tragedy. It is a tragedy when a person must grit her or his teeth just to get through the day. I advise testing the hypothesis that you really want to work as a lawyer. This requires brutal honesty with yourself.

First, work. Do anything that will allow you the freedom to pursue a law job for at least two or three hours during the day. It doesn't matter what the job is. You could mow lawns, stock books or grocery shelves at night, be a night watchman, type stuff or do data entry. It doesn't matter. The point is to be out among the working and the living — hopefully the two aren't mutually exclusive — earning grocery money. The benefits include reducing isolation and exposing yourself to industries you may never experience again.

At this point I can hear that voice inside you asking: "Why should I stock shelves? I'm a lawyer, for crying out loud! That's totally beneath me!"

Get over yourself. A huge ego is your prerogative, of course, but be aware that huge egos alienate people and usually mask a bundle of insecurities. Successful people in all fields have a service mentality. With the right attitude this skill can be developed at McDonald's better than at the city's largest law firms. Don't misunderstand: I'm not suggesting a minimum-wage job as a long-term strategy. I know you have huge student loans and rent to pay. This is an interim, transitional strategy only.

Ask for help. Develop a morale-maintenance program with your friends and family. Looking for work is difficult, and the "Lone Rangers" have it the worst. Tell everyone you know what you're looking for, and ask for suggestions. Ask for names of those who might know helpful people. Ask someone to cook dinner for you once a month and check on your progress. Is it humiliating to ask for help? That's a sign in itself that you need some. Humans are social creatures who need each other; don't fight your nature.

Give it away. Volunteer for something. Anything. You may not qualify to provide volunteer legal services since many agencies want experience, but ask anyway. You can always answer the phone or stuff envelopes or empty the trash. Need is everywhere; proximity can work in your favor. And maybe there's some legal work you can do. Could you figure out how to write a will for your sister? Help a friend with his DUI or rental agreement? This is how lots of people get started in solo private practice. An experienced attorney should look over your work at first, but this is how most lawyers learn their jobs — from scratch.

Read. Try Ask the Headhunter by Nick Corcodilos for suggestions on how to get and do great interviews. This book is best for people with experience. (Visit the Web site at http://www.asktheheadhunter.com/.) For recent graduates, Kimm Alayne Walton's books (e.g., Guerilla Tactics for Getting the Legal Job of Your Dreams) are good resources. For a thoughtful approach to vocation and calling, read Parker Palmer's Let Your Life Speak. This is a beautifully written, inspirational book – one of my favorites. Anything written by Barbara Sher is great for help with clarifying what you want to do and how to start doing it. Her four books are Wishcraft – How to Get What You Really Want, How to Live the Life You Love, I Could Do Anything if I Only Knew What it Was, and How to Create Your Second Life at Any Age. Julia Cameron's books (The Artist's Way, et. al) are great for ensuring that you don't become a uni-dimensional person.

For those of you who are feeling badly about not being hired by a large law firm, read Patrick Schiltz's article in the Vanderbilt Law Review (Vol. 52:871), "On Being a Happy, Healthy, and Ethical Member of an Unhappy, Unhealthy, and Unethical Profession." Even if you don't want to work for a big firm, read this article. It may help clarify whether you want to work as a lawyer at all.

Hang out with lawyers. Attend CLEs and make it a point to talk to someone there. Join your local or specialty bar association and volunteer for a committee. Attend state bar section meetings. Get involved with associations affiliated with your practice interests: human resources groups, human rights organizations, real estate associations, small business organizations, Chamber of Commerce, etc. If you feel shy, introduce yourself to someone and ask if they've attended this event before.

Believe in yourself. Do whatever it takes to build a quiet confidence in yourself and your abilities. Keep a journal recording your thoughts and feelings as the days go by. Track the success of your efforts so you can do more of what's working. Ask someone who cares about you to tell you everything that's good about you. And if you find yourself feeling demoralized and discouraged, call the WSBA Lawyers' Assistance Program. Don't wait until you're so depressed you can't get out of bed. (If you're already there, call anyway.)

Looking for a job is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. Give yourself credit for what you accomplish and let go of your failings. Do what you can do and don't worry about what you can't do. Best wishes to you as you continue on your journey.

The Lawyers' Assistance Program (LAP) — 206-727-8268: Confidential assistance for lawyers with emotional, drug/alcohol or other personal problems.

The Law Office Management Assistance Program (LOMAP) — 206-727-8237:

Offers consultation and information to help solo and small-firm practitioners deliver legal services of the highest quality.

The Professional Responsibility/Ethics Program — 206-727-8284: Lawyers can call a WSBA lawyer for assistance in resolving ethical dilemmas.

The Alternative Dispute Resolution Program (ADR) — 206-733-5923: Offers two low-cost methods of resolving disputes: voluntary fee arbitration and mediation.